Heart

So I feel like I'm running in place sometimes. I never feel like I'm going forward. When I find myself taking a step forward I find myself reaching back.

I can't find the words to go into detail nor do I care to find them. I can say that they fill me with doubt and despair.

What I do find however is inspiration. Inspiration, no matter how doubtful, now matter how far back I reach, to push forward and farther than I have ever pushed before.

Breaking into the comic book business is no easy task and I often ask myself it that's really what I have the passion for. I find myself wanting to do a lot of different things to express myself. I recently considered some kind of stage craft, cinema special effects, or just a change of something.

I guess the on going thought is that there has got to be something better than this. There has to be something better than working a 9 to 5 for mediocre wages, stretching, and reaching for a good house, a good job, all the while dealing with job lay offs in this economy and people who want to push you down and try to fit you into a mold that you don't fit. There has to be something better than this.

Something else rings true to my mind. To get to this point, its not an over night process. It requires hard work, dedication, and heart.  The one key ingredient is the one that I've questioned over the years and even daily. Its the one that brings everything crashing down. That ingredient is heart. Without heart you never put in the hard work it takes to get to the top.

Once again its time to take that step forward, only this time to no longer get derailed and reach back to the past. Its time for one step ahead of the other.

And on this note, now that I spent half an hour watching American Dad, I've lost track on this roller coaster of highs and lows eventually reaching to the climactic point of inspiration. So on that note, I leave you with this...

There's only one number one spot, and I'm gonna take it.


-Pat!