Some days.... Let me tell ya, some days I just lose faith in some of those people I call friends. Or maybe even considered friends.
There's something that's just really eating away at me. This really goes back to two of the reasons I left Facebook for a short period. Without getting too specific, IE. throwing out a name, if you ask me to friend you on Facebook or you friend me and I like a fan page of yours, when you remove me from your friends list do decency of removing me from your fan page too. Its just more of a hassle on my end because you deleted me and then I go and check my friends list to see why I haven't heard from you just to see I've been deleted. I swear its things like this that turn me into an asshole.
Ugh, moving on...
I was gonna write about how I'm back to mud logging now and what all that means. It started off with "more down time for me and more blogs for you" but quickly, and I mean QUICKLY, evolved to "so my time away from work is going to be more precious to me therefore I don't have time for any bullshit "woe is me" pity parties when you have every opportunity to change your life like the rest of us."
I think I just got off to a bad start this morning. Either that or I just don't have any sympathy today. I guess I'll see as the day progresses.
So yeah, back to mud logging. I'm really wanting to do things differently this time when I'm not at work so hopefully for me that means getting debts paid and buying a house instead of spending time in the bars several nights a week when I'm home.
I am a little disappointed that page one of my manga didn't get scanned so I could work on it digitally here at work but I can find other things to do. I did bring a sketch book thankfully so maybe I can get some ideas out to paper before I get home.
I feel like I've got a lot on my plate right now and I could honestly write for days on here but I have no mental organization at the moment. With that being said, I'm cutting this short.
I hope your day finds you well my friends. Until next time,
-Pat!
Wednesday, May 23, 2012
Thursday, May 10, 2012
Why I left FB
There's been a bit of a swirl immediately after I left Facebook. It caused a stir in a few, others posted on my status wondering why which confused me because why would someone ask me why on Facebook when I left facebook? I even got a few immediate responses via cell phone asking my why.
So here I am to tell you why I left and why your gonna see me back.
I left for several reasons and to say that it was an immediate decision would be a lie. It really wasn't. My decision to leave Facebook was a decision that's been a long time coming. There were a few immediate factors in the decision.
For starters, I guess I can start with one of the most embarrassing, I was contacted by a friend to ask my why I "friended" one of his friends from another state and with whom I had not met. It was an embarrassing situation because I didn't know. I didn't have an answer. I never sent a friend request because I don't usually send friend requests to even the people I know. The only thing resembling a reason that I could see was when I had a virus SOMEWHERE so I had to disconnect one of my computers from the network, and completely erased my phone and laptop. (For the record, based upon the time and date every bit of spam seemed to go out, I narrowed it down to my phone.)
Secondly was due to something that came fairly personally and due to going round and round... I felt inferior. Inferior due to some choices I made, thoughts, and overall this put me into a position to want to pull away from the world. I've felt ashamed of by someone, whether that be true or not, and it was a bit of a blow to me. I care to not really dwell on this any more so I'm going to leave it at this and never speak of it again, although I know never talking about this doesn't make it go away, but I have apologized for what I've done.
Lastly, I felt I put alot of time into Facebook. Too much time constantly getting updates from friends' statuses. I don't think that most of us realize the hypocrisy there is on Facebook. Even people who delete status comments to aim conversations certain ways. Its all a lie and I'm even guilty of it. Its a silent war on egos to see who either has the biggest ego or the lowest pity party. I had to leave because we seem to not only lie to each other but ourselves.
Here's a little fun fact, I still logged into Facebook. I logged in to see who payed attention, I logged in to see who was still sending me crap from games, but mostly to see the people that I don't have face to face or even cell phone to cell phone contact with. Late at night, at about 3 am, I logged in through my Xbox. I never shows me as being online. Of course today I logged in via my cell to check out the world I left less than a week ago.
So why in God's name would I be coming back to Facebook based on how I view it and the conversations that swirl about in drama? I miss so much. I miss updates providing links to art techniques, news updates, and statuses from my friends. Facebook is my eyes out to the world that is not immediately around me. That is why I'm coming back to Facebook.
Over these last several days I've had time to rethink my goals in life and where I'm really geared towards right now. All will be revealed in due time my friends so keep reading.
-Pat!
So here I am to tell you why I left and why your gonna see me back.
I left for several reasons and to say that it was an immediate decision would be a lie. It really wasn't. My decision to leave Facebook was a decision that's been a long time coming. There were a few immediate factors in the decision.
For starters, I guess I can start with one of the most embarrassing, I was contacted by a friend to ask my why I "friended" one of his friends from another state and with whom I had not met. It was an embarrassing situation because I didn't know. I didn't have an answer. I never sent a friend request because I don't usually send friend requests to even the people I know. The only thing resembling a reason that I could see was when I had a virus SOMEWHERE so I had to disconnect one of my computers from the network, and completely erased my phone and laptop. (For the record, based upon the time and date every bit of spam seemed to go out, I narrowed it down to my phone.)
Secondly was due to something that came fairly personally and due to going round and round... I felt inferior. Inferior due to some choices I made, thoughts, and overall this put me into a position to want to pull away from the world. I've felt ashamed of by someone, whether that be true or not, and it was a bit of a blow to me. I care to not really dwell on this any more so I'm going to leave it at this and never speak of it again, although I know never talking about this doesn't make it go away, but I have apologized for what I've done.
Lastly, I felt I put alot of time into Facebook. Too much time constantly getting updates from friends' statuses. I don't think that most of us realize the hypocrisy there is on Facebook. Even people who delete status comments to aim conversations certain ways. Its all a lie and I'm even guilty of it. Its a silent war on egos to see who either has the biggest ego or the lowest pity party. I had to leave because we seem to not only lie to each other but ourselves.
Here's a little fun fact, I still logged into Facebook. I logged in to see who payed attention, I logged in to see who was still sending me crap from games, but mostly to see the people that I don't have face to face or even cell phone to cell phone contact with. Late at night, at about 3 am, I logged in through my Xbox. I never shows me as being online. Of course today I logged in via my cell to check out the world I left less than a week ago.
So why in God's name would I be coming back to Facebook based on how I view it and the conversations that swirl about in drama? I miss so much. I miss updates providing links to art techniques, news updates, and statuses from my friends. Facebook is my eyes out to the world that is not immediately around me. That is why I'm coming back to Facebook.
Over these last several days I've had time to rethink my goals in life and where I'm really geared towards right now. All will be revealed in due time my friends so keep reading.
-Pat!
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