2012

Welcome 2012!!!

So what does 2012 have in store? What are my resolutions? How am I gonne make this better than 2011?

Lets face it friends, 2011 for me ended on a sour note. But it can only go up from here right? I wish.

Here's what I resolve in 2012, and I'll elaborate later.
1. Stop putting up with everyones shit.
2. Be more money smart.
3. Read more.
4. Draw more.
5. Lose weight (but who doesn't resolve to do this?)
6. Let go

So I first told myself that I wasn't going to put up with anyones shit this year. I've actually already started this one and didn't tell anyone.

The first example is my good friend Kay. (Sorry to throw you out there and use you as an example here.) Kay has been close to me for a few years. Hell, I even considered dating Kay several times. Most rencently, the end of 2011. (Sorry you had to find out this way. :D) After many talks about making some changes, nothing seemed to change so I told her I didn't care anymore. Now, in regards to Kay, I love that girl to death, drop almost anything for her, lol, but I had to tell her enough was enough. I just couldn't care anymore since I worried myself sick over her last year. Now, if I said that to Kay whats that say for the rest of you? Lets let this sink in and then we can move on.

.............

Moving on, be more money smart, read more, draw more, all self explanitory, but I'll elaborate a bit. Being more money smart means I'm not going out, doing this for that person, and loaning another person money. Simply put, in 2012, I'm no longer a fucking ATM. Even my MOTUC doesn't mean enough to me to care right now. I can do with out so thats more money in my pocket. Read more, well I got tons here to read, maybe I'll learn a bit. Draw more? Well you all want to see more after all right? I thought so.

Loose wight. We all resolve to do it so why shouldn't I? Getting real personal here, I saw a picture of me from about 2 or 3 years ago. I need to lose some, and when I say some, I mean alot. My weight is always something I've fought with and frankly what I'm the most emberassed about. I find myself only wearing my largest clothes and when I grow into those I get bigger ones. I wear my coat more often than not because of this fact. I'm fat and I know this. Hell, I'm too self concious to date at this point anyways. The only real attribute here is that I'm always warm. :)

I watched this documentary called Fat, Sick, and Nearly Dead. You can find it on Netflix. For one, this made me want to cry. It made me look deep inside myself to the point that I can't believe how I got to this point, but also cry out of inspiration. For anyone who has this resolution I highly recomend this documentary. It changed my life and how I will live out 2012.

This year I also want to let go. I want to let go of all my pain, desperation, addictions, and inhibitions. For the most part you all (especially if you read my 2011 blog) know my pain and desperations. I have a few addictions I want to kick. No, no drugs or anything like that. I drink, I want to kick that this year or atleast get it to the point that is for social outing only, not getting drunk, maybe some wine every now and then. Sue me, I'm 32 years old. I'm gonna drink like I am and not 21. Lets have a little maturity. I can't say this is truely an addiction, but you get the point. Let go of inhibitions? Well lets see what all I do this year. lol

God this is turning out long.

So what do I want this year to hold for me?

Artistically I want to be further along in production of Eichi. I'm going two ways with it. One, anime. Two, manga. Obviously manga would be completed first and once I get a website, your gonna see more of it. So stay tuned for that one. I want to turn to more professinal type work so keep an eye out for that too.

Lastly (and as hokey it as this may sound), I want to fall in love this year. I feel like I gave up over the past couple years and for as much as I wanted something to work out for me last year, maybe I just didn't try hard enough. ....maybe I was just looking for love in Alderan places. (lol Sorry, a little Star Wars humor there.)

So I'm gonna leave you with that smile on your face. All I can say is this year, you might wanna watch out for me, cause I'm gonna go after everything I want this year. Just wait and see. ;)

Love you guys,

-Pat!